Friday, December 15, 2006

insomnia

insomnia is defined as inability to sleep or take rest.

Here i am referring to the nights we spend in office working. How many days+nights would you have worked in a single go? I have done 4days+nights without sleep. And i believe there are people who have done a lot more.

It is not that I am workaholic. No dear, it is just that the work needs to be completed on time and when deadlines approach the efficiency of the human brain also increases and so does the period during which the brain will be active. The human brain is a wonderful thing. During emergency situations both efficiency and activity of the human brain increases by a good factor.

Oooops!, i think i am going off topic. This post is to discuss what you feel and how you feel when you have not slept for some time.

Lets start with the situation first. I am not a script writer, so i hope this turns out to be fine...

Act 1, Scene 1 - project is delayed and need to be deployed tonight. We have not done proper planning for the deployment.

Act 2, Scene 2 - It is 10'o clock in the night and we are terribly hungry. We need to get some food into our stomach and also start the actual deployment

Act 3, Scene 3 - We have had a heavy diner (sponsored by the company) and it is 11'o clock. Our stomach is full and our eyes are drowsy. And so now the deployment starts.

Act 4, Scene 4 - We start cracking senseless jokes. And to add on it we start laughing on those senseless jokes. We are drowsy. Simply copy pasting commands from the deployment doc to the system. Brain utility is at the minimum. And we are having coffee after coffee to keep us awake.

Act 5, Scene 5 - The project is deployed and all are happy. Now we have started testing the project to see if we have missed anything. Boooom!! a flaw is found, second flaw is found, third..... We are now wide awake. The brain is fully active. Heartbeats are up. The heart is pumping more blood to the brain. We fight. We debug and decode our own scripts. And finally after much struggle around 4 in the night we think we are done.

Act 6, Scene 6 - Now we need to decide whether we should go to sleep and return early to handle problems or go to some place, party and be back in the morning without sleeping. By this time your eyes are closing. You feel a bit heavy. Your food has still not gone down. You need to drink a lot of water. After a lot of struggle and arguments, we decide that a 2 hour sleep would do some good. So we rush home and fall on our beds.

Act 7, Scene 7 - It is 7 in the morning. And the maid is downstairs ringing the bell for some time now. She is paitent. I have woken up, but dont want to get out of the quilt. Wishing that she gives up and goes away. But she is very insistent. Why does she has to clean the room today. Cant she take rest for a day. Well, finally i get up with around 2-2.5 hours of sleep, open the door and let her in. And then jump back in bed hoping to catch 30 minutes of sleep more. But the maid has her own set of questions. Where are the clothes to be washed? Why have we not got the resources (bucket, soap, etc) to aid her cleaning process? I just wish she would do her work quietly and shut the door when she goes. But nooooo. Well, I answer her - "will get the resources today, etc.". Just when the maid is about to go and i am dreaming about my peaceful sleep, the bell is rung again. The car-wash person is here and wants me to open up the car so that he can clean it from inside. I suddenly have a notion that the world is very dirty today morning. And all cleaning needs to be done today itself. Why dont people simply stop cleaning everything? Why is there so much dust in this world?

Act 8, Scene 8 - So I am now fully awake. The car-wash person has gone and my car is gleaming bright red. I can feel that my brain is tired but I know that no matter how much i try, i would not be able to sleep now. Well anyways, I take a bath to freshen up and shoo away the sleep. But the bath does not help in any way - except increase the effort in changing clothes. I feel as if I am a day old. I am hungry but my stomach is full. Anyways, i start my bike and drive to office. I feel as if there is a lag between the situations i see and the reactions which i am supposed to do.

Act 9, Scene 9 - I am in office, hungry and thirsty. Park my bike, punch my card. Plugin my lappy and look at the mails. The project deployed has bug reports already. Good!!! Start the debugging process. Drink a lot of water to keep myself awake and make a few no of trips to the toilet. Take coffee.

Act 10, Scene 10 - It is 12 am. My body has started reacting to sleeplessness. The mind has somehow communicated the lack of sleep to the body. The body now has a tingling sensation. Stomach is still full and hunger is still there. The hunger is becoming more prominent. Eyes are drowsy. Crack pot jokes have gone down. People came and went with their "good work" slogans. I just wish they had the courage enough to stay up a few nights so that they realize our "sacrifice".

Act 11, Scene 11 - It is 1:26PM and it is lunch time. Finally i am going to get some food to eat. But I am not sure where i am going to put it as my stomach is still full. Tiredness has increased. Stuff myself up with whatever junk and stale food that was available.

Act 12, Scene 12 - It is 2:18 PM and i am feeling very very sleepy. My eye lids are not agreeing the command that i am giving and are trying their best to close my eyes. Suddenly i am drowsing on the chair itself. My hand is on the keyboard, eyes half open - half closed. And this is just the moment when my boss makes his appearance - bad luck and wakes me up. All work gone to drain. Get calls from banks offering some stupid credit card. Just want to sleep. My mouth is dry. The uncomfortable chair that i sit upon has now become very comfortable. If i leave before 4:30, it will be considered as a half day. So i will have to be in office and be unproductive till 4:30.

Act 13, Scene 13 - It is 4:15 and i cant take it any more. My eyes are by default half closed. And i can fall sleep walking. Dont remember how much water have i drunk. Just remember that i have been to the loo lots of times. My stomach has suddenly grown huge and full. I dont feel hunger any more - just the need to sleep. I pick up my lappy and am back driving home. I dont care about the half day i would get due to my going home 15 minutes before time.

Act 14, Scene 14 - I am back home. Wanting to sleep. Buy my screwed up brain wont allow me to sleep now. I am on my bed with my lappy and watching movies - reading novels. I realize that there are stretches of time when i have not read anything or saw the movie. I have missed an entire scene and i dont remember what i have done during that time. I had not slept. And i had not pondered on any issue. Have not thought any thought. I was just blank...

Act 15, Scene 15 - It is 8 PM and i dont feel hungry any more. I dont feel thirsty any more. I dont feel the need to watch a movie. I dont feel the need to sleep also. My mind is still tired and my stomach is still full. My mouth is still dry. And now i can meditate - if that is what you call when a person can remain blank and without feeling anything around him. I am at peace.

Act 16, Scene 16 - It is 10 PM and i am again stuffed with junk food. I am on my bed and sleeping very heavily. I dont dream anything. I dont feel anything. You can cut me in my sleep and i wont feel you cutting me.

I wish that i can sleep like this every night.

P.S. =>> Some scenes have been tampered with (a little) to make the story more interesting and readable.

3 comments:

Nidhi Kaushal said...

Tooooo Good dear....Very very interesting story with all the feelings and all. I could feel the moments. And there seems no stuffing of soemthing that doesnt happen. You writes great and the things is a reader can feel all at the same time. Hope if you can write any of such stories every weekend......I shall be waitign every friday for such interesting stories, which could not stop me from laughing loudly in my office and making others to stare me.ha haa haa...well great writting.
All the best for coming ones......

Jithin R. J. said...

awesome..i just read two posts of ur blog i have been addicted..i am gonna finish this reading today..

Jithin R. J. said...

awesome..